Yeah, that title may seem a bit harsh but I really don't know what else to say. So I know I haven't written in awhile and if you are curious to know why, you can check out my YouTube channel where I have been slowly but surely riding and endless train to nowhere.
I am very harsh on myself so let's just get that out of the way and talk about how I fail at life.
So...
After nearly a year since completing one of the biggest milestones of my life, College. I have yet to find a suitable and sustainable job. It is not for lack of trying, though, I have put resumes and cover letters out to nearly any position that remotely looks like what I majored in, plus receptionist jobs, but that is a bit weird for me since I am a guy (but I still applied). I have heard back from a few of them and many with the same answer. "Thank you for showing interest in our company but we went with someone more suitable for the job. Good luck on your job search."
Okay, that is like the equivalent of getting stabbed, and I have been stabbed repeatedly. I always wonder how someone like myself cannot seem to get a job at all. I worked so hard in college achieving a 3.8 GPA. It is like nothing I did even mattered. I look to the internet to calm my nerves, but all I see is people either talking about how they are so happy to have a job they love or how they couldn't find a job and had to go into something that they never wanted to do.
I know, I sound ungrateful. At least you went to college and have a degree. Why not take a job serving coffee? Where are your priorities? You need money!!
Look I can stare down so many people and spout how I want to do what I love but no matter what, I always get that crap. I am tired of waiting for my dreams, I want them.
So I started a YouTube channel because I wanted to make videos. It was at least close to what I went to school for. (Broadcast Communications) I started making vlogs and got views from some people, then I began eating candy, which garnered a lot of attention from the Germans. German candy video has 11,000 plus views. I enjoy that, and I love hearing what people have to say, but now, It is so overwhelming to make any videos that people want to watch. I don't understand how stupid people can get millions of views and I can't get more than 30 on a video with decent content. Yes, I know about SEO and all that other great stuff people use to get views. I just wanted to do what I love, but now I have no idea what I am doing anymore. I almost feel like I have no purpose, along with no career, no friends, and certainly no creativity.
So much for being happy.
Don't worry though. If you are interested, I am still going to be working on my YouTube channel. I needed to rant about my situation. If I keep everything bottled up, I inevitably will explode (silently though)
Until the world revolves again (hopefully sooner rather than later)...B
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